Saturday, October 17, 2015

Chapter 6: The Croco-diamond Behaves Badly

After finishing breakfast that morning, the giant man suggested that all go out to the barn to get the cringle crisps ready to be loaded into the ton-o-tap. The kangawrong, who, oddly, had been reading the news, raised the paper in front of its face so it couldn’t be seen.
“But…but, no…that’s quite impossible,” said the croco-diamond. “Because…I can’t…because…I’ve just had my nails done.” He nervously clicked his nails and then looked away as if staring innocently into space. “Nails done,” the croco-diamond said under his breath, with conviction.
“You could wear your gloves.” The giant man was surprised at the croco-diamond’s response. Usually the croco-diamond wanted nothing more than to be around cringle crisps.
“No, uh, no I’m afraid that won’t work because…the gloves, yes the gloves…they’ve gone…missing.” And the croco-diamond walked over to his hammock and dramatically gestured toward the area where the gloves were normally stored.
And the giant man saw that they were missing. Then, returning to the kitchen, he noticed now that other things were missing. Such as his new bandana, a pair of his shoes, a pot of cactar jam, the kitchen towel, and a spatula.
“The clouds are stealing other things now?” The giant man muttered to himself. “What would a cloud possibly want with a spatula?”
Then he noticed that while he had been looking around his kitchen the kangawrong and croco-diamond had gone missing too.
“I hope the clouds haven’t gotten you two!” He called out. But there was no response.
#
An hour later the ton-o-tap driver was leaving the giant man’s farm when he saw a curious sight. It appeared to be…a walking bandana? With very large shoes that didn’t fit?? On crutches??? And the, well, he guessed it was the head though it was covered up with the bandana, seemed to be wearing…
a fedora????
As he slowed to get a better look, the walking bandana flagged him down with a crutch. The driver stopped and opened the door to the ton-o-tap.
Just then a…sticky kitchen towel??? Wielding a giant spatula??? in its gloved hands commanded “Unlock the ton-o-tap! Or I shall spat you with my spatula!”
Speechless, and certainly confused, the driver walked to the back of the ton-o-tap. The kitchen towel waved the spatula threateningly behind him, or perhaps it was adjusting itself. The bandana clomped behind, tripping over its shoes and making a quiet HoP HoP boing noise as it walked.
The driver unlocked the ton-o-tap and in a sudden move the kitchen towel threw itself over the driver’s head. Due to the stickiness of the towel the driver could not get it unstuck from his head. Though, it did smell pleasantly of cactar jam, which the driver often put on his morning toast.
A ruckus seemed to be going on inside the truck. He could hear frantic munching and chaotic crunching.
It sounded like crunch munch crack! crash!
munch crunch crunch.
smash crack! Bang!
munch scrunch crunch! crack!
munch!
Flop! Pop! Bang! Clop!
The driver, frightened, yelled out “Help me! Help me! I’ve been attacked by a towel and now I’m all sticky!”
The giant man arrived quickly on hearing the driver’s cries. He was surprised to find his missing shoes and spatula on the ground behind the ton-o-tap.
And puzzled to find the driver with the missing kitchen towel on his head.
And curious as to why the tip of his bandana was hanging out of the back of the ton-o-tap.
And intrigued to know what, exactly, was going on in there.
Gently swinging open the doors, he discovered…
What he had been worried to discover.
The croco-diamond was laying on baskets in a cringle crisp coma. His eyes were half shut, his mouth full of uneaten crisps, and his entire body was covered in crumbs.
The fur of the kangawrong had dusty purple patches from the crushed cringle crisps, and it had nervously hopped with its extraordinarily large feet all over the back of the ton-o-tap, crushing baskets and crisps until all that now remained were teeny tiny little pieces.
The giant man knew he should say something.
So he said the first thing that came to mind.

“Oh dear.”

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