thanks for fucking up my door bitches

People who have never hung out with me in real life probably think every thing I write on here is bullshit. Everyone else knows it's not.

I just got home from work, am exhausted, was eating a clif bar for dinner, when suddenly it sounded like a SWAT team was trying to bash in my door. As I got up to see what the fuck was going on the handle on my door fell off.

for fucking real

I put the handle back on (more or less) and opened the door. There was an asian guy, his wife, and his 4 noisy fucking kids (who are currently running up and down the hall screaming - good job parents - allow me to give you the asshole of the month award). They had mistaken my room, 241, for their room, 261 (thought asians were supposed to be good at math?). Since the guy was banging and yanking on the other side of the door handle it caused my side to fall off (my guess anyway).

I should mention here that I have a do not disturb sign on my door and I'm listening to ministry, which I'm pretty sure people can hear while standing at my door (I got a room with no guests on either side of me - advantage of having status in a not too crowded hotel).

Twenty years living in hotel but there's always something new happening.

I'm not the only one who dislikes babies on planes

Today some fucktard sat in the bulk head, middle seat, with her child in arms infant.

Only 60 people had boarded the plane. The back of the plane was wide open. Annoying.

Please. Listen. Babies go in the back so we in the front don't have to listen to them screaming and crying for the entire flight (as aforementioned infant did). It's not that bad if you encounter a screaming baby on a plane every few months. But I travel twice every week. And I don't have kids. So it sucks to spend 5 hours every week on a plane (it's guaranteed they'll be screaming in the airport too so maybe that should be 9 hours) listening to someone's screaming child (or, like tonight, 4 screaming kids, two of whom were old enough to not be screaming and crying).

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels that way. I was emailing with my friend Klaus about the screaming infant:

Klaus:

My luck with kids on planes is legendary. I prepared a letter on one of my flights to Europe and handed it to the flight attendants. I couldn’t resist. 

 
Luckily I didn't end up in zip-ties for being a high maintenance-bitch. Of course this is an incomplete list and I forgot smacking on that list and guess what happened on that flight? ;)

the particle zoo! (since it's too cold to go to the Denver zoo)

I'm now two days behind in my dark energy class...

An interesting thing about quarks. They have two parts to them (a positive quark and a negative quark). But even though they have two parts a quark can't exist without both parts, which is why it's considered the smallest particle (even though it can still be divided into two parts). Kind of like siamese twins, or a worm that gets cut in half and forms two new worms. If you try to separate the positive quark from the negative quark they re-bond. One part always has a positive charge and is heavy, the other part is always a negative charge, and light.

Did you know there's such a thing as a charm quark? It's a positive quark, and the third heaviest (mass wise) quark. You can buy a stuffed charm quark doll here if you're a plushie who has a fetish for sub-atomic particles. The charm quark always hangs out with a strange quark. The strange quark is the third lightest quark. They are just two of 61 elementary particles that make up what's called the particle zoo (free admission on wikipedia!).

Charm quarks were discovered in 1969. The November Revolution is not the typical revolution where mobs burn buildings and loot stores and put in place their own government which always sucks worse than the old government. Two different physicists discovered the charm quark at the same time and announced their findings jointly on November 11, 1974 (i.e. the November revolution).

As I was trying to memorize all these quarks I started thinking "who really gives a fuck?" So I tried to find out what the practical usage is of knowing something is a charm quark. I found a lot of stuff like this:

What the fuck does THAT mean????

It turns out there is a practical application for classifying quarks by their mass. It's how particle physicists figure out the decay of a particle.  It also explains how particles can combine. And helps astronomers calculate the weight of things in the universe, like planets. Why would you give a shit in the real world? Because maybe you want to turn lead into gold. Or create an even more destructive nuclear weapon, if you're an asshole.

I might be procrastinating memorizing quarks. But really, I thought you should know about them.