crackers to cockroaches

This weekend at my parents' house, on top of celebrating my dad's birthday, my brothers fixed my mom's paddle boat rudder and started designing a navigation system (which is funny because the pond behind their house isn't big enough to get lost). They are also going to add a system to disable an uncooperative paddler's pedals (that's because my nephew Michael paddles in an inefficient manner, either too fast or too slow).

And then for some reason graham crackers came up. I did some research on wikipedia and found out they were invented by a minister and doctor named Sylvester Graham. He invented them for the graham diet, one of the tenets of the diet being bland food suppresses sexual urges and keeps people from masturbating. Which I found interesting since they are made with something called endosperm which, combined with seeds causes plants to flower. Hm.

Then my dad and brother tested me to see if I could remember the address, zip code, and phone number of every house we had lived in from the time I was five (I remembered and now my dad thinks I really do have asperger's). Weirdly not a single house that my dad has ever owned shows up on google maps (the picture, not the map itself).

Then at dinner the next day I brought up Lorenz maps because we were talking about the storm in Colorado and my siblings made fun of me for having a "favorite meteorologist" and then because I couldn't remember the U sequence.

From there I had a conversation, while drunk, with a friend of my brother's who is a mathematician. We discussed (and be we I mean, hee, me) the U sequence (I looked it up finally because I could only remember 5 numbers, it's 1 2 4 6 5 3) and my favorite mathematical theorems (Goedel's incompleteness theorem 1 & 2 - perfect theorem for those who hated higher maths). And my mom said "I can't believe you let your sister talk to a girl you are romantically interested in while she is drunk".

Then I looked at animals that I could adopt for my niece and nephew (will adopt Winter the tail-less dolphin for Nat and a great white for Michael - my dad said "you know if you adopt a great white you have to go live with it for 6 months" and Michael got excited so we had to say "haha grandpa was just joking").

Which leads to cockroaches...from my brother Bob:

For $10 or $15 dollars, you can adopt a cockroach.
http://magblog.audubon.org/nothing-says-%E2%80%98i-love-you%E2%80%99-roach-chocolates

it's not that robots are stupid

Ever wonder what a robot would look like folding laundry or putting on socks? Check out this article and hilarious videos.

In the upcoming robot war, just give them socks! Then you can escape.

my idiot super bowl moment

My brother Steve went home right after our late lunch/dinner (what ever that's called)  and told my parents he would call when he got home.

I would like to pause here and say I don't own a tv. I've never had a tv. I also have not had a land line phone for 10 years.

Anyway, half time started and all of a sudden my brother Steve's name showed up on the bottom of tv screen. I was like "Oh my god, why is Steve's name in the super bowl???????????????" I was like"Steve hacked the super bowl!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why did he do that?????????????????"

Turns out my parents have some how set up their tv so it shows the name of who ever is calling their phone. Don't ask me. I don't know how they did it.

My brother Bob was like "please don't write this as a blog post because then people will know what a dumb shit you are."

But it's too funny to not write about.