I'm working with this fairly obnoxious woman. The rest of my customer set has been great. I hate working with women because I think they act super bitchy to try to prove themselves or something. She's over weight and likes to sit so close to me that I can feel her breathing on me which is so gross. Also, she smells like fried chicken farts.
The other day we were in a meeting, and we were talking about documenting what they call "master data" (the definition of which is not relevant). This woman was nattering on as if she's super smart (though what she says is inconsistent and doesn't make sense) when she suddenly said "masturbater" instead of "master data". There's a kid who's my age that's been in a lot of our meetings and we've been joking around the whole week, and I couldn't look at him because I knew I would start laughing.
Everyone of course pretended they didn't hear the woman say "masturbater" but now people have started saying just "data". I laugh every time I think about it myself...
Saturday, September 25, 2010
it only looks like you're lost
Contrary to rumors, I'm still among the living, and have finished my book proposal, which I'm sending out this weekend, thanks to my great editor Matt. I've been traveling and working a lot.
Currently in lovely Aiken, S.C., working at a site next to a silo of nuclear waste. The silo's name is Hector, which is an acronym for something that no one can remember.
I've decided to break down and buy a GPS after getting totally lost driving to the hotel from Columbia (it's about an hour drive) at 11 o'clock last Sunday night. It was so dark I couldn't read any of the street signs and I ended up driving way out of my way. Then I got to Aiken and my mapquest directions were totally wrong. I found the street my hotel purported to be on, but it was a winding road into a forest with a few houses. I called the hotel and told them I was lost. The woman asked for my cross streets but didn't recognize the names of any of them (I was only 3 miles from the hotel at that point).
She kept assuring me that I was going the right way, and that soon I would happen on an Applebee's. I was having my doubts, and she said "You're not lost, it only looks like you're lost". Then I came around a turn, the road opened up to 2 lanes, and there was the Applebee's.
I have a room on the ground floor of a motel. I don't like it because I have to keep my curtains closed and no natural light gets in my room. The woman at the front desk assured me I'd be safe in the room, and I was like why would I worry for my safety? I'm in the middle of the woods.
Besides Hector, there are some other weird things about where I work. They have alarm drills constantly. The one for a nuclear waste spill is reminiscent of the sound track to a 70s sci fi movie. It a series of weird tones like doo doo DOOOOOO doo. Then there's the fire alarm and a safety alarm (meaning someone was injured in the building). The site is huge, and the only way I can ever find my building is by looking for a sign in front of another building that says "Whole Body Counting Facility". What ever that means.
The other day I went to an outbuilding that looked like a rusty trailer. An hour before I got there they had chased a rattle snake out of the conference room. Although I'm doing well with my snake phobia (saw a snake on the trail when hiking with my dad and was fine) I decided not to put my feet under the conference room table because it was dark under there and I couldn't see if anything was hiding in the corners.
Today I might go to a blue grass festival and then work on my book...tired and need a few down days to get ready for next week's fun and adventures.
Currently in lovely Aiken, S.C., working at a site next to a silo of nuclear waste. The silo's name is Hector, which is an acronym for something that no one can remember.
I've decided to break down and buy a GPS after getting totally lost driving to the hotel from Columbia (it's about an hour drive) at 11 o'clock last Sunday night. It was so dark I couldn't read any of the street signs and I ended up driving way out of my way. Then I got to Aiken and my mapquest directions were totally wrong. I found the street my hotel purported to be on, but it was a winding road into a forest with a few houses. I called the hotel and told them I was lost. The woman asked for my cross streets but didn't recognize the names of any of them (I was only 3 miles from the hotel at that point).
She kept assuring me that I was going the right way, and that soon I would happen on an Applebee's. I was having my doubts, and she said "You're not lost, it only looks like you're lost". Then I came around a turn, the road opened up to 2 lanes, and there was the Applebee's.
I have a room on the ground floor of a motel. I don't like it because I have to keep my curtains closed and no natural light gets in my room. The woman at the front desk assured me I'd be safe in the room, and I was like why would I worry for my safety? I'm in the middle of the woods.
Besides Hector, there are some other weird things about where I work. They have alarm drills constantly. The one for a nuclear waste spill is reminiscent of the sound track to a 70s sci fi movie. It a series of weird tones like doo doo DOOOOOO doo. Then there's the fire alarm and a safety alarm (meaning someone was injured in the building). The site is huge, and the only way I can ever find my building is by looking for a sign in front of another building that says "Whole Body Counting Facility". What ever that means.
The other day I went to an outbuilding that looked like a rusty trailer. An hour before I got there they had chased a rattle snake out of the conference room. Although I'm doing well with my snake phobia (saw a snake on the trail when hiking with my dad and was fine) I decided not to put my feet under the conference room table because it was dark under there and I couldn't see if anything was hiding in the corners.
Today I might go to a blue grass festival and then work on my book...tired and need a few down days to get ready for next week's fun and adventures.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
