Then, in September, my crazy neighbor moved out and new people moved in with...a retarded, ugly, fat dog that barks non-stop, even when they are home. Now my house sounds like a kennel and I have dogs barking on both sides.
This is a summary of our email exchanges:
Me (to my new neighbor):
Hi [let's just call him fucking asspipe], your dog was barking yesterday for most of the afternoon and now this morning. My house guest is still here. If you could do something about that I would appreciate it. Steve and Abby are gone for the weekend so we've also had to contend with their dogs barking pretty much nonstop on the other side.
I'll be around this afternoon if you want to come by to see my place. Let me know.
Thanks!
Asspipe:
Sorry we were out a while yesterday! Promise we will be mindful and good news is Candace returns to work 12/1 and Apollo goes with her to work. Are you home the week of Thanksgiving?
Aside from the dog issue we'd love to meet you :) Maybe you can swing by 1 night this week for a glass of wine? We heard you've done some cool stuff upstairs and we're doing some work too.
As for the dog, sorry, I hate it too. Is there anything you'd suggest for when we're not in the house?
Me:
I would like to meet you both as well! I have a guest this week and am not sure what our plans are yet. I'll let you know. And if you'd like a tour I'm happy to give one. I've redone everything in the house.
As for the dog, I'm not sure. When my ex's dog stayed at my house I used to take him for a long walk before I left and he was fine. Maybe the vet could make some suggestions.
I've been dealing with Steve's dogs for over 6 years now and am getting ready to turn that over to the city to handle. So, sorry if my email seemed bitchy. It sounds like a kennel in my house when all three dogs are barking. And it has been typical that their dogs bark all night until they get home which makes it impossible to sleep.
Anyway, enough about the dogs. When I figure out my schedule this week I'll let you know.
Thanks for the response!
I find it funny when people ask me to solve their problems, like why their dog is barking. My guess, it has no toys to entertain it, they don't exercise it properly, and they don't leave a light on for it when they are gone at night. If it were my dog, I would be mortified and would research the shit out of the problem until I fixed it. That's why I'm not an asspipe.
Me (a week later, on a week night, when asspipe's dog had been barking for 6 hours, at the time I sent the email it was 1130 at night...and yes, I still get up at 5 am):
Your dog has been barking since I got home at 545 this evening. Can you please do something?Thanks.
Asspipe:
We are doing our best. Seriously.
We take him to work every day. Does Steve at Find Solutions know that we take him to work Every day? We are great dog owners.
Why don't you come introduce yourself instead of just emailing complaints all the time. How long have we lived here and you can't say hello? We are neighbors.
Do not email me again until you introduce yourself. Cool?
So now I have to meet and be friends with someone who doesn't give a shit about his fucking dog? And he's a great dog owner? WTF? Also, I have tried numerous times to schedule a time for us to meet but he never responds. So fuck him.
Anyway, I've turned the situation over to the city and we have to go to a mediation session and come up with an agreement. The mediator contacted me and was like "you might not get what you want." As if people have a right to have an animal that barks non-fucking stop for hours on end with no regard to other people.
I'm going to hopefully get a friend to go with me so it's not my four neighbors against me.
The worst part is I bet that if they just took their dogs out for some exercise this would not be an issue. But, why have a fit happy dog when you can have a fat lazy one.
Drama...I hate it.
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