Monday, July 30, 2012

back splash

I was complaining to a friend about my kitchen remodel hoping he would have some tips for me:

Me:

Busy weekend trying to finish up loose ends for my kitchen remodel. I really hate shopping and walking around looking at things. Like, I don't fucking know if some tile will make a good back splash or not.

Pascal:

Ooh yeah the perils of choosing a splash back. Now this is also a bit of a mystery to me. You have fashion, taste and practicality to balance. I favour stainless steel as it's really hygienic, easy to clean and fairly cheap. However it shows up the muck. Glass is super fashionable in the Uk at the moment. Tiles can be cheap or stupid expensive with ones that are crafted on the thigh of an Italian maiden using only her feet, "look you can see the imprint of her toenail", "but they aren't square and look shit", "but they cost me $1000 per square foot", "hmm", "want some coffee, it comes from beans that have passed through the digestive tract of a patagonian trouser hamster","fuck off, I hate you". Don't ask me for advice on splash backs babe. I will get it wrong and you'll hate me for ever. I'll happily tell you whether I like your choice though.

I found it interesting that he mentioned "hygienic" when referring to his kitchen. He cooks a lot so maybe he meant it from a food perspective. Though, he's also the type of person that would have sex on the butcher's block.

Too bad the backsplash I want, which is made out of recycled wine bottles, costs a billion dollars.
 

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