my writing is like me - thin

At last year's pitchfest in March an editor from HarpersCollins asked to read the first 60 pages of my book. I was told that if she was interested she would respond within a year, otherwise to not expect to hear anything. I was shocked she wanted to read my book because she publishes women's literary fiction.

Anyway, I got an email from her today:

Dear Franki,

First my apologies for taking such an inordinate amount of time to review your material; second, let me say that you are my hero.  Your sense of adventure and perseverance are monumental.  However, I think what you have here reads more like a magazine article (albeit a long one) than a book.  Your narrative style lacks a certain depth that I think would engross readers, so I worry that an audience that might be curious, won’t be hooked by the story.  It just feels a little thin to me in the telling.

Your experiences are amazing, but so much of successful memoir is in the telling, and I worry that this lacks richness.

It was a pleasure to meet you, though, and I do wish you the best of luck.

Oh rejection. You make life so much fun.

In other news, my uncle reviewed the contract from the publisher who was interested in my book. I'll post it here in case it helps a fellow writer:

As to her Agreement:

1. PAR 1 I would not transfer your copyrights to anyone. You're just opening yourself up to litigation.

Have you filed for copyright protection? If not see http://www.copyright.gov/fls/fl109.html

2.par 5 Even if she breaches the agreement she wants to be held harmless. BIG NO NO

3. PAR 7 DOES NOT CLEARLY SPELL OUT ALL COSTS AND DOES NOT GIVE YOU PREAPPROVAL ON COSTS

4. PAR 12. NO right to audit

5. par 16 SETTLE ON JURISDICTION  

 BOTTOM Line I would not do deal as written she controls all aspects of the book, you could lose your rights to your book, where she can be served with a suit is left vague and even if you win you will not be able to collect.

 He also suggested I talk to other authors about their experience working with her, very good advice.

 Bottom line, I may have to bite the bullet and get an MFA to get my fucking book published...