Today I talked a friend into going to the aquarium with me, though it took some convincing.
Our texts:
Friend: we are going to be the only ones there without strollers.
Me: you mean you aren't going to bring a monkey in a stroller? dressed in an elvis costume? the monkey should be wearing big sunglasses.
Friend: Aw, I was going to surprise you with that! now I can't go.
Me: you could always dress up like the pope. that would surprise me.
Friend: the pope and I have a non-compete clause. should I come dressed as jesus?
Me: I have a restraining order against jesus.
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