poems and performance reviews

Yesterday I emailed my friend, the esteemed poet JD Frey and author of Umbrellas or Else (check out his web site here; proverbs from purgatory especially hilarious as is his haiku about knee caps).

I wrote:

I left my old job in July and am now working for a non-profit. Unfortunately, they gave me a position of responsibility, and I find myself having to write 20 performance reviews by Friday for employees I don't really interact with because I have asperger's and don't like people.
I started reading Umbrellas or Else for inspiration as to what to say in the aforementioned reviews. I'm thinking that each review should quote at least one line from one of your poems.

But then I was worried that might upset you.
In my defense, I have the perfect person for "doppelganger, pterodactyl, ectoplasm scones".

Please?

JD wrote:

FF,

By all means, if poetry be the food of performance reviews, play on.

Just be careful--not everybody is going to "get" that you really aren't challenging them to jello-wrestle with Barbara Walters...

Nice to hear from you and I hope things are happy and fulfilling.

JDF

 

I wrote:

 

Actually, thanks for that idea! I'm also supposed to come up with a list of team building exercises for 2013. Wonder if an appearance by Barbara Walters is out of our budget. She might do it for free since we're a non-profit.