bonking to the jackal hut (pics at the bottom of the story)

This weekend FH and I did a back country ski trip up to the Jackal Hut. He has a friend who was invited to go but couldn't make it, so on Tuesday we decided to take his spots.

FH did some research and determined it was a 4 1/2 mile ski in. Looking at the topo it was obvious that it was a steep climb to the hut but we both assumed there would be a lot of switch backs since the trail up follows a road.

We got to the parking lot before most of the other people going to the hut (it was a group of 12 friends and us). Since the group was composed mostly of 25 year old guys we decided to head up to the hut while they waited for a few stragglers because, as FH said "we're old and slow".

The first mile or so of the route crosses a fairly flat plain, with no challenges except for having to go down a hill, cross a creek, and get up the other side without falling into the drink. I managed that with no mishaps and FH said "well, that's the hardest thing we're going to do today".

As we started up the mountain FH was still joking about how we'd be at the hut in 2 hours and then I would say "when are we going to do some skiing?" It turns out, the approach to the hut was a grueling 5.67 miles, not 4 1/2. And there were no switchbacks. It was just straight up. And up. And more up.

The group of 12 finally caught up with us, and then passed us. I realized that not eating breakfast and not tapering off on the distance I've been doing every day on my tread mill was a huge mistake. Also, I was wearing a 25 lb backpack (I weigh 115 lbs, so it doesn't seem like much just reading the weight, but to me it was a a lot of weight). I realized that my clumsy skiing got even worse with the backpack. The sun would come out and make us hot and two seconds later the snow would be blowing so hard that we couldn't see more than a few feet ahead.

We finally caught up with the group, who had stopped for a snack. I was exhausted. When one of the guys said "well, we're about half way there" I thought he was joking. I threw the pack down on the ground and sat on it, crushing 3 of the 6 little creamer packs FH had packed in our food bag. I felt them breaking but to be honest didn't care.

The trail went on and on, to the point where I was ready to just throw the pack on the ground, crawl into my sleeping bag, and wait to die. I have only once in my life ever felt the effects of altitude but I realized that was what was happening to me, on top of bonking, and having two inflamed hip flexors from walking too much on my tread mill (I thought, initially, that the skiing would make them feel better - WRONG).

After hours of just struggling to move forward we went around a bend and...there was the hut! Finally! And wouldn't you know it, we had to go up one last hill to get to it. I was like "FUCK YOU HILLS!"

I got to the porch, sat on a bench, contemplated puking, and then remembered we had beers and rallied enough to walk into the hut.

It ended up being a great weekend, and we beat the group record back to the car (they said 2 hours, it took us one). The ski down was epic because the snow had consolidated in the warm weather Sunday and iced over. I felt like one of those luge sleds in the olympics. Surprisingly, I only hit one tree.

Some pictures:

Jackal Hut - it's awesome!!!

View from the porch, including the hill you have to ski up, at sunset

Survived a short ski Sunday - my blisters from Jackson are back

the fun hog, and me, in the back, probably trying to figure out how to get my mitten through the strap on my ski pole

following tracks and trying to protect my blisters

you can see 6 fourteeners from the Jackal Hut

cit-e coyote

If you ever wondered how to get a hyper active chihuahua to behave on a walk, I'd suggested taking the dog to an urban city park in Denver around lunch time.

yes, that is a HUGE coyote, running around in a field at a city rec / park center

I'm not sure what, exactly, the coyote was doing in the city (great food, but they don't have money to pay for it so that can't be it). Perhaps it's all the construction that's going on around the city. The coyote was carrying something in its mouth which I hope was food foraged from the trash but which might have been a cat.

It was interesting to see Mr. Nuts, who thinks he's in charge where ever he goes, suddenly hunker down and walk as quickly as possible away from where the coyote was, like "nothing to see here, no, I'm not a chihuahua, I'm just a very small hairy person, looking to get away from you before you notice me". At 10 pounds Mr. Nuts would barely make a snack for a coyote but I don't think animals are that rational.

high altitude soda bread

Making my own bread has always appealed to me, mostly because people always told me making bread is "so easy". Since moving to Colorado and taking a stab at making bread I've been pretty unsuccessful, ending up with loaves that were burned on the outside and undercooked on the inside. I know this is because baking at altitude requires adjustments, but never knew what those adjustments were.

So after the ton cake I made, FH suggested, if I wanted to keep trying to bake, to make something he might want to eat, namely soda bread. Thinking of breads past, I was a little worried to try it, so decided to make it Friday night while he was out with a friend visiting from New Hampshire. I did a search and found this high altitude cooking blog with a recipe and went to the grocery to get the ingredients. That proved to be interesting because it was snowing and most of the homeless people in my neighborhood were wandering the aisles. Also, it took me 10 minutes to find the butter milk because I was looking in the butter aisle until redirected to the milk aisle by one of the aforementioned homeless people. And I was interrogated by the manager on check out because I had purchased 4 boxes of baking soda and salt for my neti pot and that set off some alarm that I might actually be cooking meth (FH said "well you do fit the profile, skinny and too much energy").

In any case, I got home and got started.

all the ingredients...wait...something's missing - oh yeah, need a glass of wine

the recipe said to mix the ingredients with a paddle attachment - I had no idea what that meant so just used the attachment I had, a kind of whisk looking thing

...which proved to not work so well as the batter formed a column up the whisk thing and then stopped turning

I finally turned the dough out to knead it and, as per the directions, it was unwieldy and sticky - I flopped it around in the flour for a few minutes and figured "fuck it, it must be done"

I was supposed to put an X on the top of the bread, which was not as easy as one might think, in fact, it looked less like an X and more like the distorted signatures you create on those store pads where you have to sign your name with your finger...the weird stuff on top is sugar and buttermilk, and yes, I was supposed to do that

the recipe said to tap the bread and if it sounded hollow it was done - I was not sure exactly what that meant so I tapped it, figured I had heard a hollow sound, and pulled it out

At this point panic ensued because the instructions ended with "pull it out of the oven". Nothing about how long to cool it, whether to take it out of the bread thingy, etc. So I sent a text to my friend Camile who said to let it cool an hour and then take it out of the tin. She also said the picture made the bread look yummy and that if it sucked just to put butter on it because butter can make anything taste good.

the bread cooked through! and was edible!

I ended up eating the end piece off the bread after it cooled to check that it cooked through and that it was not disgusting. It tasted good except I thought it was a bit floury. Turns out soda bread is supposed to taste like that. I brought it over to FH's house and he and his friend both ate a piece. They suffered no ill effects that I know of.

things I should be able to write off on taxes

Since other special interest groups get some crazy tax write offs (writing off purchased desserts as "research and development") I thought maybe I, a special interest group of one, should get some tax write offs too.

• Shoes I bought last year - I needed them for work, or at least the three times I went into my office. Otherwise I work from home and wear socks but in the interest of not being greedy I just want the shoe write off. Besides, have you seen the latest designs for the Adidas Sequence running shoe? Awful. They should be deductible.
• Beggin strips - Chihuahuas are kind of like a charity group since they are always unemployed. And if you give a chihuahua a beggin strip he will usually stop being a public menace for at least the 5 seconds it takes to eat the beggin strip.
• Ski equipment - I think about work and solving world hunger and shit while I'm skiing. So that should be an office or charity expense.
• Wine - I think about those things when I'm drinking as well. Or this could be a medical expense.
• Cleaning products - It's like research and development for house cleaning since I finally fired my maids for breaking shit. And mops are getting expensive these days. Yeah, maybe I do have an excessive number of mops (5) but each has a special functionality that I identified as part of my research and so I need them all.
• Any anyway it's not like I get any recognition for my mopping abilities so I should get a tax write off. 
• Pizzas I've ordered - Obviously an office expense.
• Groceries - Since I can't cook and every meal I've made with the aforementioned groceries is inedible I should get to write them off as "research and development".
• Soda stream - Making my own sodas is reducing waste on the planet, keeps me from having to go to the grocery store to buy cokes, and it doesn't require electricity, so it's like an "energy efficient" thing that I should get a deduction for.
• Not procreating - How come having a kid gives you a tax write off? Kids cost a lot of money and use up tax revenue for their schools and stuff. I should get money back for not having any kids.
• Dinners with people I don't like - Sometimes you invite a couple W and X to dinner, and they invite their friends Y and Z who are obnoxious assholes that like to air their marital discord in public. Or sometimes you talk to people at a party and they seem cool and then you invite them to dinner and realize that they are actually semi brain dead and unable to converse on topics that require more than 5 working brain cells. That is definitely a work dinner.

a pre-screening of Mr. Nuts' avant garde short film - "pretend it's bacon"

a film critic's reaction to the Oscars

NOTE: the author of this post did not watch the Oscars, has not seen any of the movies nominated, and is channeling a chihuahua.

A review of the Oscar winning films by Mr. Nuts.

film critic, lamb lover, and chihuahua

Dallas Buyer's Club: "I would have thought this movie worthy of an Oscar if it was about buying bacon. Otherwise I'm not sure why anyone would want to see this film."

Twelve Years a Slave: "I was hoping to see more cat chases by chihuahuas. And then after the chihuahuas catch the cats, they also catch some squirrels. And then they are fed steak and bacon. For those reasons I found the movie not very believable or reflective of real life and didn't really enjoy it so was shocked it won an Oscar."

Blue Jasmine: "Were those ladies carrying bacon around in their purses? If so, I liked it. If not, I didn't like it."

Frozen: "This movie made me sad because it made me think of frozen bacon, which is difficult (but not impossible) to eat."

Gravity: "Why would anyone want to go into outer space? There's no bacon."

20 Feet from Stardom: "I think this movie would have won more awards if it had been about being 20 feet from bacon."

...and the rumors are true! Mr. Nuts was asked to host next year's Oscars. Unfortunately, he won't be able to because he'll be busy eating bacon.

a rogue bassonist at the symphony

On friday night FH and I went to see There Will Be Beethoven at the Colorado Symphony. Granted, we haven't had the best of luck attending events there (I went to see swan lake there a few years ago and a woman sitting at the end of my row puked all over the place - yes, she was drunk - and when we went to the opera we had technical difficulties). But FH is a big fan of radiohead so we decided to take our chances.

The first part of the symphony was a replay of the score from There Will Be Blood. It's very dramatic and the conductor had the musicians pause for what felt like, to me, an excruciating amount of time between movements. We were seated between two elderly couples, which was fine, except that I was a little nervous about the drama of the music and the fact that, as we were entering the building, an ambulance was taking an elderly guy out who had apparently had a heart attack.

In any case, the second movement had just finished with a huge drum roll crash bang and the resonance of the music was hanging in the air when I heard a loud "BRUMP!" I turned to FH to ask what instrument had made the noise (I don't know that much about music) and realized, by his expression, that it was fart.

Now I admit to laughing at farts. The problem was there was dead silence in the room and I didn't want to make a scene. But not being able to laugh just makes me laugh harder. I managed to stifle my laugh for about a second and then made a noise that probably sounded like I was choking on my own tongue. Luckily the music started again and I buried my face in FH's arm. Just as I got my (silent) laughter under control the man sitting next to me burped and his wife, sitting next to him, let out three more farts. Just when I thought it couldn't get any funnier she pulled out a bottle of beano and took a few, with water.

By intermission I had stopped (silently) laughing but suggested to FH that we move to an empty row behind us. I couldn't sit next to that couple any longer because their digestive issues were distracting. As the first movement of the Beethoven symphony started I settled back to enjoy the music.

...and would have been fine EXCEPT that, at the end of the second movement, FH looked over at the farting woman, and put his fist in the air and pumped it, like we used to do as kids to get truck drivers to honk their horns at us. I'd never seen anyone use the hand signal for "let it rip" at the symphony before so that made me (silently) laugh all over again. I pinched FH on the arm pretty hard, and he didn't do anything else the rest of the symphony.

It was a nice evening all things considered, and the symphony was surprisingly not crowded, which ended up being a good thing because if I hadn't been able to switch seats I don't know what would have happened. On the walk home I laughed the entire time and FH lamented the number of cheap mexican restaurants around the Denver Performing Arts complex.

tread desk!

This weekend I bought a treadmill. I've wanted one since I was 12, and yeah, it DID take a long time to buy one.

FH managed to carry it into the house from his truck even though it weighs 215 lbs. And he got it put together in 15 minutes. I had one part to put on and I accidentally cross threaded the screw. Hope I'm not losing my skills.

One of the reasons I wanted a treadmill is so I can walk while I work. Most of the time I'm focusing on very technical shit and I found it helps to walk while thinking.

I figured if I walk at a 20 minute mile pace (not unreasonable) I can walk 24 miles a day. FH first reaction was "maybe walk at a 30 minute mile pace until you get the hang of it" and "why the fuck would you want to walk 24 miles a day?"

Um, doesn't everyone want to walk 24 miles a day?

In any case, after the treadmill was set up he found an old board in the garage that we were going to use for target practice and some screws and brackets. We used that to make my treadmill desk (a colleague paid $1,500 for his desk - mine was free). It's held on by a bungee cord, which doesn't sound stable but turns out to be quite stable.

The drink holders are perfect for all of my work things and help keep my desk clutter free.

i love my new desk!

and even though I only walked on the treadmill for 4 hours today (following FH's advice to start slowly) I still got my 20K fitbit badge - actually did 23,000 steps today - and I got a helicopter badge, what ever the fuck that is

The other thing FH did was create a spreadsheet to help a friend of his calculate how to jump his rzr. Personally, I think his friend should just ask for help building a tread desk...

chihuahua olympics - the lamby

Yesterday the lamby event kicked off in the chihuahua olympics.

Mr. Nuts started out looking rough in practice. The US was worried he might not be able to come through and medal.

"I just felt really distracted and not focused," he said. "All I could think about was bacon."

But he came through in the competition and easily took gold.

Congratulations Mr. Nuts for winning gold in lamby!

olympic sports I'd like to see

I have been slacking off on my blog lately, but I assure you it's because I'm busy. In the next few days I'm going to upload some vids of skiing taken with the gopro (unfortunately my best wreck was not caught on film).

In the mean time, and in the spirit of the olympics, here are some new sports that I thought up that might be more interesting than some of the sports they currently have:

• Hockey, except the puck is actually a rabid chihuahua and the sticks are made out of beggin strips
• Figure skating, but with pumpkin seeds on the ice and the Russian mafia holding a member of your family who will be tortured if you fall
• Ski slope, but instead of fake jumps and rails you have to navigate around and jump over homeless people
• Skeleton, but you have to drink 3 shots of russian vodka first, and your helmet is made out of peeps and your sled is recycled cardboard
• Speed skating, but combined with ice fishing on a pond that doesn't have smooth ice and the crappies are jumping out of the holes
• Half pipe, but besides tricks you have to avoid the drones that your competitors are controlling
• Super G, but instead of gates you have to ski through a tunnel of live wires the whole way down
• Baby sitting a drunk Bode Miller while also having to listen to his wife Morgan give him advice

Go athletes!

super bowl sweep

Sunday was my first ever "I'm actually watching it" football game super bowl. I was pretty excited because the broncos were playing. I even know the names of three guys who play on the team: Wes, Peyton, and Demaryius. Peyton throws the ball and the other two guys catch it.

I thought a great way to prep for the super bowl would be to vacuum and clean the floors. FH did some prep too. He has this special tv thing that lets you rewind the tv. He normally sets that up, somehow, so when we watch football we can fast forward over the commercials (and I've learned to ignore spoiler texts from my dad, who is also watching the game, because we're a few minutes behind on the live play).

Unfortunately FH's chihuahua stepped on the remote control for the tv right before the game started and changed the channel. That caused the tv to not be able to rewind because...if you switch the channel...the tv doesn't remember the old stuff on the original channel...or something. I think time travel is easier in theory to understand than tvs. At least now I know when my brother calls he isn't hacking the super bowl.

I was told at work on Monday morning that I picked the worst super bowl ever to watch. Oh well. I still like the broncos and I'm glad there wasn't a blizzard because I definitely wouldn't have been able to see/understand what was going on. Which, given the outcome of the game, doesn't seem like a bad thing actually.

At the end the announcer guy was like "and the seattle seahawks are receiving the Lombardi trophy". I was like "so they also won something else besides the super bowl?" and FH was like "no, you win the Lombardi trophy for winning the super bowl". I found that interesting because 1) it's not called the super bowl trophy so how would the average person know that the winning team isn't getting yet another award and 2) all anyone ever talks about are super bowl rings and no one was given those at least while we were watching on tv. Maybe they get them later at a dinner party or something.

I was pretty sad about the broncos losing which is weird. They're just a football team. When I told FH I was sad he said "congrats, you're a real fan now."

I was glad to see a sign on a local business when we were headed to the grocery yesterday that said "we still love you broncos!"

the evil pound cake

On Saturday, while waiting to pick FH up at the airport, I decided to make a lemon cream cheese pound cake. I saw a special on PBS with Martha Stewart and she made 3 different pound cakes in 10 minutes. Seemed easy.

I made the mistake of not reading the whole recipe before starting. It did seem like a lot of ingredients for something that had to fit into a bread tin, but I've never made a cake before so I just went with it. Then I realized, once I had everything ready to mix, that the recipe made 9 cups of batter and the pound cake only required 5 cups. I said "fuck the math" and decided to just split the 9 cups between two pound cakes. That might be what caused part of the problem...

wine was not one of the "official" ingredients

Note, I used a butter made of yogurt to grease the bread tins. The flour didn't stick to it very well. I should have used real butter. That might have also added to the disaster unfolding.

I couldn't get the tops smooth like Martha did. The top looked like it had some kind of skin disease.

 It said to cook the cake for 65 minutes or until a toothpick came out clean. This resulted in overcooking (later found out I was supposed to reduce certain ingredients and add other ingredients for cooking at altitude).

When I finally pulled the pound cakes out they looked great. For about 2 seconds. Then the top of the cakes suddenly sunk like the fucking Titanic.

They have a very distinctive V shaped top. Like V for "victory" or V like that show about aliens. The cake on the left sank dramatically, the one on the right took a few more seconds.

One of the contributing factors to the cake sinking might have been the temperature of the house. The battery had died in FH's thermostat and it was only 62 degrees inside the house.

Surprisingly, especially since the middle of the cake was undercooked (FH called it "moist", but really it was undercooked) and based on its weight (FH said he was surprised to find it weighed more than a brick of gold) it tasted pretty good. FH brought one of the cakes into work, where I assumed it would be thrown out after a reasonable amount of time had passed. But I got an email from one of his employees saying that the cake was "so good it's evil". Special thanks to WL who brought me vanilla extract from Mexico!

FH said maybe don't ever make a pound cake again...

BTW, Jake got his new eyes installed by FH on Sunday. Hooray!

I make a crappy cake for him and he fixes my car - no one said partnerships were equal

party wave videos

Here are the two party wave videos (where I crash right after I stand up on the board):

 

 In this vid I crash moments after take off.

In this vid I crash and my board tombstones

I'm not a role model, so probably shouldn't be a mentor either

FH has an assistant who also does technical work. I offered to mentor her by teaching her data modeling and process modeling. FH thought it was a great idea.

But, to be honest, the only useful mentoring advice I've given her is the following:

T: Went roller skating today. Bad idea, my knees hurt so bad.
Me: Try bio freeze. It's like crack cocaine for the knees.

As for career advice, probably not as useful:

T: FH gave me my own office!
Me: I'd recommend putting crime scene tape around your guest chair to keep the guys in line. I did that at my last office. HR drew the line at the fake blood though.
T: Maybe I can get some fake organs.
Me: They used to sell eye balls at the dollar store.

And she gave me some advice as well:

Me: Don't tell FH this. I just took his toilet apart. Replacing the innards to make it more efficient. Hope I don't fuck it up.
T: I have faith in you! Girls can do home improvement too!
Me: I'm using a hack saw now, which was not specified in the instructions. Oy vey.
T: That's just improvisation. If you have more screws left over than when you start then worry.
Me: Or when FH gets home and there's a taken apart toilet on his kitchen table.
T: I would come help before that point.
Me: It works! Go me! And go broncos! (was sort of watching the game while I was working)
T: Did you have any parts left over?
Me: Some screws. But I think they are just extras.
T: Uh oh. I won't tell if you don't.

(then I made a joke about a super bowl party since I was working on the toilet but there was no response)

some more pics surfing the party wave

Here's a pic from a video where I caught the same wave as FH. Of course, he surfed it in and I wrecked.

I surf goofy foot. Also, on most waves I managed to keep a safe distance from FH.

when the board shoots straight out of the water it's called tombstoning the board

the surf board fins are supposed to be IN the water

Two of my favorite still shots from the vid where I wreck into FH:

FH's board (left arrow) and my board (right arrow)

FH calmly surfs on while I flounder behind him

We saw three snowflake eels the past few days in the low tide. The marine biologist Tony said they're coming in because the water is unseasonably warm. Very cool!

damn women drivers

Today conditions were rough at Olas Altas. And then I accidentally wrecked my surf board into FH's board. I didn't just ding his board. I rode up the back of it.

When we got back to shore the "life guard" Mario was like "dude, is your board okay?" and I was like "yeah, fucking women drivers". The board, for the record, is more or less okay (minor repairs necessary).

seven feet, rocks

Yesterday Olas Altas was big, almost as big as during May's storms.

The waves were big and fast. It took forever to get out to the line up. At one point I just let go of the board and dragged it behind me by the leash.

FH and I caught a wave and I fell off almost immediately, which sucked because it took me 10 minutes to get back to the line up. On the second wave I was determined NOT to fall no matter what. I paddled my ass off and suddenly was in the slot. I got up on the board and had one of the longest rides I've had. Then the wave crashed on my head. Miraculously I didn't get washing machined or hit by the board.

When I got back to the line up FH said "I can't believe you caught that." It turns out it was a 7 foot wave. FH was paddling into it (I followed, figuring he knew better than me which waves to catch) when he realized I was also paddling in and he stopped because he thought I was going to get munched by the wave and potentially injured. He said he saw me get into the slot and then was shocked that I was standing up. He saw the top of my head for a second and then saw the wave come up over my head. I'm not sure how I caught the wave but I was glad because the rest of the morning was a shit show.

The next wave I tried to catch closed out. I got washing machined by three waves. Right as I thought I was getting close to shore and out of the shit I put my feet down and realized I had drifted into an area that FH told me to avoid because it's full of rocks. And the rocks are covered in sea urchins. If you avoid getting scraped up by the rocks you'll get stung by the urchins.

the rocky area I was caught in at low tide - normally the rocks are under the water

 I managed to get out of the rocky area after a few minutes of struggle. Then I decided it was time to go in. Meanwhile, in the line up, FH had been looking for me. Because I was getting washing machined he couldn't see me at all. I think he was pretty glad to see me stumble up on the beach.

Also, there are locals that watch surfers from the sea wall (far left in the above picture). I'm not positive about this, but suspect they called an ambulance when they saw me getting washing machined in the rocks. As I was trying to make my way back to the beach I saw the ambulance pull up with its lights on. After I got back to the beach it left.

I talked to a marine biologist Tony, who is also a surfer. He said what happened (and it's very common even for people who surf there every day) is the rip tide pulled me into the rocks. As I was surfing I thought I was surfing to the right but the tide was pulling me left. You can't really tell on the wave.

As celebration for surfing my first big wave we went out for drinks at the freeman. Nice views from the roof.

sunset from roof of the freeman - rocky area of olas altas at the bottom left

El Faro - light house is far right - it's one of the highest lighthouse in the world - we hike up it in the early morning as a warm up for surfing

sunset - the large stone island at the far left of the picture is host to seals, and of course sharks

moon over the historic district of mazatlan - FH's house is near the blue building in the center of the picture

mexican food

Not quite the same as in the US...

At playa norte today, best fish ceviche, although today we found a piece of octopus in it (which I'm allergic to). No bad reaction so far.

home made tortilla chips...porque no?

And a big shout out to Taqueria Playa Sur. Best vampiros ever (here vampiros are like a taco pizza - I didn't find any english web pages with Maz style vampiros). And papa locas (again, english recipe, not quite the same).

Taqueria Playa Sur is an outside restaurant. This is the grill. We got there before closing. Normally there's a long wait if you go during dinner hours.

Vampiros (on the left) and papa locas (front). Yum.

ejection seat

FH commented, after looking at over 20 vids of me trying to surf, that I never fall off the board like a normal person. He said "it looks like the surf board has an ejection seat".

He's surfed this brown board for over 7 years and never flown off of it like I do. I'm sure no one who knows me will be shocked by that.

barrel roll

Since I've been surfing with the big brown board I have to be careful when I fall off (which is 9 out of 10 times I try to stand up) because I don't want to get hit in the face with the board.

This ride, I started to pearl, but the wave was slow so I hung onto the board and tried to keep it from pearling. I later found out from FH that you can't save yourself when you're pearling. In any case, as I held onto the board it flipped over. I managed to get it upright by the time I stopped. The board did hit me in the arm above the elbow and I have a nice bruise from it.

It was worth the bruise!

how to miss a wave

Learning to read the ocean, and know when a surfable wave is coming, is a lot harder than I thought.

This vid is called where did the waves go?

This vid is called what happened to the wave????

pearled

When you weight the surf board too far forward you pearl, which means the surf board heads straight for the ocean floor. This video gives a good idea of what that experience is like.

and no vacation is complete without a trip to home depot

The water was a lot calmer the second day we were here than it was the last time in Maz though the first day the waves were pretty big and sounded like buildings falling down every time they crashed into the shore. I did go out the first day but after watching the good surfers eat shit I was surprised I got up on the board at all. After getting banged around for an hour I decided to rest. Good thing, because the next day (day this pic was taken) conditions were perfect.

Rare to get beginner waves at Olas Altas but we got them. Also, the water is unseasonably warm. We saw one jelly fish. There are a lot of sting rays on the ocean floor though so have to watch out for those. I stepped on two today, and though neither stung me one mouthed my foot. Good thing I haven't washed it lately. The ray spit it out. The waves should be getting bigger next week (3 - 6 foot waves as opposed to 1 - 3 foot waves). Hopefully I'll continue to do okay on the bigger waves.

One of the hazards of surfing (especially jumping on the board as opposed to sitting on the board) is banged up knees. This is after the first day of surfing. They've turned a nice purple color now.

The bike shop off Olas Altas. FH and I rented bikes for two hours to go to Home Depot. The hurricane down here did some damage to his house including the roof, causing a lot of water damage. I spent a day scrubbing mold off the walls and cleaning the floors. Fun to take a bike ride through traffic and tourists except that my bike chain kept falling off. Luckily FH knows how to fix anything.

Home Depot at Mazatlan. Same as the one in Denver but more mexican.

At the far left of this picture is FH's friend Willy, who takes care of shit while FH is back in the US. He is a member of a band and they were playing at the closing of this bar (owners spent too much time smoking pot and drinking to run the bar according to local gossip). The band was good but FH and I have been getting up at 630 every morning since the dudes come around 8 to work on the roof so around midnight we decided to head home.

second surf videos

This was my best ride into the beach (had to bail off the board before I hit the sand and ruined the board).

And this video shows why you should manage your surf leash (I managed to get tangled in mine more than once).

first maz surfing video

Huge thanks to FH for teaching me how to surf!!! He's the best instructor ever!!!

This is my last run I did yesterday while he was out in the water coaching me.

I'll be posting more videos shortly. I have some great wipe outs. And thanks again to my mom for the gopro!!!!

some pics from maz, since my video doesn't seem to want to load

Apparently I've overloaded the "internets" in Mex. Here are some pics from surfing today.

Is it beer 30 yet?

Making a fashion statement on the beach with my Ugg slippers, for which I've caught endless shit from the surfer boys. And I have the requisite coke and e-cig (breakfast of champions - kidding kids, don't fake smoke).

Took the brown board out today because the waves were pretty small and this thing is like a canoe. You don't even have to stand on the string, apparently, to surf. It weighs as much as I do. Glad it didn't hit me in the head.

"Now that I've gotten my ass kicked, time to go in"

Still shot, wipe out, from the gopro. You can't even see the board.

maz redux

I've been in Mazatlan since Sunday and we just got internet access today. Hooray!

Will be posting some funny surfing vids in a day or so I took courtesy of the gopro my mom bought me.

lack of communication makes for a "shitty" situation

On new year's day FH and I headed home from Steamboat, but first we stopped for breakfast at Nora's, and FH had three cups of coffee. As we were traveling down highway 40, a desolate stretch of road, FH had to poop. There was no place to stop though, so he suffered along until Kremmling. I was suffering too because he was farting up a storm.

We got to Kremmling and then decided to continue on to Frisco because FH was hoping for a nice Starbucks bathroom. But there wasn't a starbucks directly off the highway so we ended up finally stopping at Georgetown. Luckily it was warm outside and I was able to crack the car window, otherwise I might have died from the farts. Regarding that gas station just off I-70, I personally wouldn't go into the men's room for at least another month (assuming it doesn't get razed to the ground in the mean time because the stench won't go away).

FH got back into the car and I turned on the heat to warm up my feet. I smelled farts again so I was like "why are you still farting???" and FH was like "I'm NOT farting!" I thought maybe his clothes had been fart infused so as soon as we got home he changed his clothes and then we headed to an irish bar for a new year's drink (the idea being to hit the bars before everyone else showed up so we wouldn't have to deal with a crowd).

I was sitting on a bar stool when suddenly FH said "I smell the farts again and it's coming from you!" I was like "dude, I am NOT farting". We puzzled over the situation, wondering if somehow my clothes also had gotten fart infused (I didn't change because I didn't have any other clothes to wear). I also worried that maybe our sense of smell had been destroyed after over an hour trapped in a car filled with noxious gas.

Then FH said "let me see your shoe". Turns out, I had dog poop on my shoe and that's what the smell was. He said "you must have stepped on that dog turd behind the car when we were packing at the motel". I was like "what dog turd?" FH had noticed it the day before but didn't tell me. I didn't see it when we were packing the car up because it had snowed.

We both started laughing like 5 year olds. I eventually got the poop off my shoe. And FH said from now on he will tell me if a dog poops behind my car.

happy new year!

rabbit ears

Staying at the Rabbit Ears motel up in Steamboat. It's kind of like a noisy, shitty hotel combined with weird satanic neon and a logo that would not be out of place at a strip joint.

if bugs bunny did acid

But it's centrally located, and I like to walk, so I shouldn't complain.

FH did a back country ski but I wasn't allowed to because of my blisters (will spare you the pic of the blister on my left ankle, which isn't as big as the one on my right ankle, but still gross). Then we went to find a pair of shoes I could wear that don't have a back on them because I was getting tired of walking around town in my slippers.

one more person ask if I'm wearing slippers....yes I am FUCKING WEARING SLIPPERS

Embarrassingly, I bought two new pairs of shoes. But one pair was on sale.

ugg slippers that are meant to be worn outside - perfect for post skiing, climbing, etc.

I will be so happy if I wake up a few days from now and my blisters don't look like red dwarfs.

saddles and saddle sore

Yesterday I made a mistake. Well, two mistakes. The first involves a hike. My right ankle was so swollen from my now somehow infected blister (even though I put nu skin on it) I couldn't ski. So I decided to hike a trail at Cache Creek while FH and his sister skied it. The last 2 miles, heading towards the car, I was feeling pretty good (well, it was fucking cold outside and to be honest I couldn't feel my feet since I was hiking in my summer trail shoes - bad packing on my part - I didn't expect to be walking anywhere, only skiing) so I decided to run back to the car. Which was awesome until I got to the car and realized, as my feet were heating up, that my right shoe was full of a bunch of soupy shit from the blister.

At which point I probably should have told FH that I didn't think I could skate. But I wanted to practice more hockey stuff...so...I went skating.

By evening I could barely walk. So we went to the million dollar cowboy bar for some pain killer. FH insisted I sit on one of the saddle seats. For the record, I only sat side saddle.

drinking million dollar cowboy beer on a saddle - for real

By the end of the evening I was in excruciating pain (from a blister - give me a fucking break). Didn't get much sleep last night.

who's the dumb ass who decided running 2 miles in the snow on a blister was a good idea...um, me

Just got a text from my dad (sent him the above picture asking for advice). He said "just saw the pic (of my blister) - definitely gross!!!" Hahaha! Blood usually makes him throw up.

Had a painful ride from Jackson to Steamboat, where I was supposed to do a back country ski tomorrow (we'll see what the heal looks like tomorrow). FH found the tv remote funny (we were watching the broncos game - blood bath).

Fisher Price - my first TV remote