pre screen

I usually rip on TSA but I would like to say "thank you!" for putting me on the TSA pre-screened list. I guess after all these years of flying they've figured out I'm not a terrorist.

I do wonder about the sanity of some of my fellow travelers, however. On Friday I rushed to Burbank after my ToGAF training class and arrived at my gate to find the raving cat lady. She was an older (60s) woman dressed in hippy clothes yelling into her phone so loud you could go into the ladies room and still hear her. It seems that while she was doing what ever it is that crazy cat ladies do in Burbank a neighbor called animal control because she had a dying cat missing one leg hanging out in her front yard. Animal control put the cat to sleep, at which point the neighbor called crazy cat lady to inform her. Crazy cat lady called animal control and started screaming at them.

In her conversation with the neighbor and animal control it could be deduced that she had MANY cats but thought it was silly to assume a cat would be in pain, or near death, just because it was missing a leg. She kept screaming at animal control "BUT DID YOU FOLLOW PROTOCOL????" I was texting with a colleague who was in the other terminal (to see if he could hear crazy cat lady - he couldn't) and my colleague said "with your luck she will be sitting next to you!" I decided that I would protest if that were the case.

Instead I was seated next to a British guy who seemed normal at first. But shortly after take off he tapped my arm and said "do you have any rubbish for the stewardess?" and then pointed to the (empty) aisle. I was like "Ummmmmmmm. No.", closed my eyes, and tried to sleep.

But sleep was impossible since the brit kept tapping me and asking me if I had any rubbish for the stewardess. A few times the stewardess actually were collecting trash but for the most part he was apparently seeing something I wasn't (like someone collecting trash).

When we landed the brit stood up before we had stopped at the gate. As the stewardesses yelled for him to sit down he turned to the passengers (we were seated in row 2), bowed to the plane, thanked everyone for flying with him, and then saluted all the passengers (admittedly it was a pretty gallant salute).

Just when I thought the situation couldn't get any stranger I saw him pull a stuffed penguin out of his pocket. A key was attached to one of the penguin's legs with yarn. He pet the penguin on the head and put it back in his pocket.

It was...just...weird.

But better than crazy cat lady.